What Gets YOU Up in the Morning?

The other day, my dad asked me a pretty simple question: what gets you up in the morning?

It was kind of one of those odd, silence-breaking, thought provoking questions that come around about once a month.

So I sat there and ruminated.

My first thought was: not a whole lot. On days that I don't work or have school, I usually sleep into and often through the noon hours, on into 2, maybe three o'clock. The world keeps humming along at a blistering pace, and there I sit (lay, rather), inanimate and completely tranquil.

Then I thought about the question from an even more literal perspective. Well, often times it is a beeping alarm clock that first molests me in my groggy funk. It starts off slow and monotonous, but then gradually crescendos into rapid fire like an AK-47 assault rifle. Or a machine gun.

By that point, I usually decide that I can't take it anymore (my family/roommates are long passed that by then and are ready to rip my alarm from the socket in the wall, and me from my bed), so I decide to hit the sleep button and see if I can last 10 rounds of "snoozing" the thing. I usually can't. I turn the alarm off by round seven, knocked out, and sleep away another two hours.

I started thinking about a few days back when I was perusing through a list of majors that are offered by the University of Kansas. It's the summer before my junior year of college, so I figured it might be about time to figure out what I want to do with my life.

So I was checking off majors that I knew I wasn't too terribly interested in or qualified for: Oboe? No. Slavic Languages? Nie. Tribal Law? I beg your pardon?

That's when I stumbled upon one degree in particular that caught my interest. Undecided (undergrad, PREP) College of Liberal Arts and Sciences. I guess with a major like that, the only way to respond to someone who asked you that infamous, glib of a question: "well, what are you going to do with THAT?" would be to say, unabashed: "well, I don't know, really. I haven't decided."

Am I interested in being undecided? Well, I wouldn't say I'm morally opposed. Am I qualified to be undecided? Most definitely.

So I highlighted Undecided as a possible candidate and made a small note to self: "this one has potential."

Another major that really snatched my attention: Colon & Rectal Surgery.

How, exactly, does a prospective freshman in college tease through all 299 degrees that KU has to offer, and narrow down the field to that? You have majors ranging from Interpretive Dance to the French Horn. And everything in between. Didn't you enjoy playing the French Horn in elementary school? Bobby, you played a mean French Horn! Why don't you give it a try, I'm not so sold on this Colon stuff.

I mean, I guess SOMEBODY has got to do it? Maybe the allure of fingering around someone's duodenum was just too tough to pass up?

In twenty years, when asked this same question, I'd like to be able to answer it with a variety of two word combinations: my job, my family, my Royals, etc. I'm too optimistic to count out my job or potential family as possibilities, but right now, the Royals might be wishful thinking.

I haven't answered the question yet, and I'm sure many of you haven't either. But maybe you haven't even asked yourself the question yet?

Try it.

You might eventually answer it with: my children, my nagging wife, long walks on the beach, or conducting a nice colonoscopy at the crack of dawn. Keyword: crack.

So have at it: what gets you up in the morning?

1985 (Kansas City Royals ed.) by Bowling For Soup

Frenchy just hit the wall
He never saw the ball
0 for 4 today
Tomorrow he'll still play
His dreams went out the door
When he turned twenty four
Only been a "clubhouse man"
What happened to the plan?

He was gonna be an All-Star
He was gonna be a stud
He was gonna rob home runs
On the hood of Dayton Moore's car
His long horrendous swing is now the enemy
Looks at his OPS
And nothing, has been, alright since

Dick Howser, George Brett
Way before Ken Harvey
There was Frank White and Wilson
And players that I'd pay to see
His teammates, in the minors
They tell him that he's dog $%#*
Cause we're still preocccupied
With 19, 19, 1985

(1985)
Woohoohoo

We've seen all the strikeouts
Ned Yost says were fine
Escobar, Lorenzo Cain
Even Billy Butler
He popped out again
To first base he barely ran
Thought we won a trade
When we picked up Jeff Suppan

Our best reliever's name is Bruce Chen
And who's that tiny guy that we bring in from the pen
When did reality hurt so much
Whatever happened to base hits, home runs
(on the radio was)

Dick Howser, George Brett
Way before Mike Jacobs
There was Frank White and Wilson
And players that I'd pay to see
Our veterans in the dugout
They tell 'em that we won't win
Cause we're still preocccupied
With 1985

Woohoohoo

12 game losing streaks, make it stop
When did we start letting fly balls drop?
And when did futility become tradition?
Please make this stop
Stop!
And bring back

Dick Howser, George Brett
Way before Berroa
There was Frank White and Wilson
And players that I'd pay to see
Our veterans in the dugout
They tell 'em that we won't win
Cause we're still preocccupied
With 1985

Wohoohoo

Dick Howser, George Brett
Way before Jon Sanchez
There was Frank White and Wilson
And players that I'd pay to see
(woohoohoo)
Our fanbase is dying
They're all now into soccer
Cause we haven't made the playoffs
Since 19, 19, 1985

The "Me Generation"

There are those times when I lose a sliver of faith in humanity. The culprits? Celebrity scandals, senseless acts of violence, or any time Nicole Polizzi opens her mouth.

And then there are those moments when I'm on a lonely Kansas highway after a long day's work, and I look to my left, expecting to find more miles of barren wasteland, a windmill (rather, an army of windmills), or a nuclear power-plant spewing bile into a pond brimming with floating, lifeless fantails, but instead see a brown haired human being in the lane beside me, wearing white-rimmed sunglasses at night, holding and possibly operating an iPad, feeding, petting, and ostensibly bathing two fully-grown poodles, blaring music loud enough to be confused with a rock concert, all the while this piece of tender meat just happens to have the responsibility of the driver of a two ton, four cylinder vehicle that's barreling 85 miles per hour toward the endless horizon and on me and my hybrid.

Wind in his hair and a conscience clear as fresh, spring water.

The road ahead, lucky enough to even garner his peripherals.

Me generation? No. We're just multi-tasking savants.

In no way do I condone drinking and driving, but I'd rather you do that.

Put the phone down, put your life on hold. Buckle up and respect yourself and those around you.

Thanks for stopping by.

A Poem For Dad

Never expects less
Than anything but my best
Always the hardest to please
Always my toughest critic
Maybe you saw more in me
Than I could ever see in myself

Everything I have
Is credited to you
When I am down the in doldrums
I know you'll pick me up
Never a friend
Always a father

Thank You.

3 (of the many) Bare Necessities to a Healthy Body and a Healthy Mind

1. A good sweat- No matter how you do it or when you do it, a nice, vigorous sweat will help rejuvenate you, make you feel light on your feet, and clear some unneeded clutter out of your mind. I notice I do my best thinking when I'm out on the trails and my body is in motion. Unlike any other time of the day, I can prioritize the significant from the petty, and gain an appreciation for the things I have in my life. Running trails, basketball courts, treadmills, what have you, go to your little get-away to sweat out some toxins and stress.
2. A cold shower- I realize this sounds a little crazy, but if done right, it will feel heavenly. Complete Necessity Number 1, and then sometime in the next hour, get in a lukewarm shower, and gradually work the temperature down. When you get out, you will feel refreshed and energized.
3. A plate full of color- Live by this: the more colorful and vibrant your plate looks, the better. Now, I was born, but I wasn't born yesterday. I realize that you can finagle your way around this rule of thumb with artificial snacks and desserts filled with fructose corn syrup and trans fats. Let me clarify, the more colorful, vibrant, and NATURAL your plate looks, the better. Greens are as good as gold: broccoli, spinach, peas, cucumbers, the list goes on. Reds and blues: strawberries, raspberries, blueberries, tomatoes, fresh peppers. If 70% of your plate or more looks and tastes natural, you're going to reap the benefits in the short and long term.

I try my best to incorporate these three habits in my life, and when I do, I love the way I feel.

If you give it a shot, I bet you will love it as well.

Thanks for stopping by.

Welcome

Welcome, friends.

My name is Dan. Well, my given name is Daniel, but Dan is just fine. Either is fine, really, as long as we abstain from Daniel Joseph. Daniel Joseph makes my skin crawl.

Daniel Joseph. Yeesh. Those four seemingly innocent syllables remind me of my fire-breathing dragon mother. Well, most of the time she is a wonderful lady,  but in those recurring moments when I fail to make my bed, miss curfew, or sleep in late, she manages to tower over me, which is quite a feat, figuring I'm almost a foot taller than her.

In those unfortunate moments, she grows into a much more formidable figure, like when Mario finds a mushroom, and shrinking, I become "DANNYUUUUULLLL JOSSSSSEFFFFFF!" So you can call me Daniel, or Dan for short. Hold the Joseph. I'd be just fine with that.

In my quest to become a better writer and (more importantly) a better person, I've created this blog as a therapeutic diary of sorts. I plan to share my limited insight on life, a few of my opinions, and all things hysterically absurd that happen to me.

Like a lot of things in life, with writing, the more you do it, the better you become at it, or the easier it becomes for you to do it. That also includes, but is not limited to, distance running, playing a musical instrument, embarrassing yourself in front of large crowds of people, and eating copious amounts of food. All of which I do on a regular basis, and all of which you will surely be learning about in the coming posts.

Once again: welcome. I hope this blog will give you something. A truth, a laugh, a smile. Only time will tell.

Thanks for stopping by.